3rd XI
Matches
Sat 15 Jun 2019  ·  Division 7A
Aldershot CC - 3rd XI TVCL
34/2
188
Wargrave Cricket Club
3rd XI
Wargrave 3s vs Aldershot 3s: Wet Wet Wet

Wargrave 3s vs Aldershot 3s: Wet Wet Wet

Freddie Lanch18 Jun 2019 - 07:56
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Rain snatches victory from the 3s

As tough as it will be based off the title, I will do my absolute best to keep this report clean. It would be a shame if this time the report gets taken down the same morning from the website due to the questionable content. It wouldn’t be the first time, but trust me it hurts. Last time it made me shed a tear. For the minute numbers out there who are super fans of the famed Scottish 80s soft rock band, I only assume you can tell what the main feature of this report will be. Barely a paragraph in and I count 4 Wet Wet Wet song references already. The game was abandoned, I have to make something out of this.

Wargrave made the big old journey over to Aldershot with the weather doing its absolute best to hold back the river. The side was much changed from the previous week, in came Sam P and Shravan (or Sharon if you are The Mole) in replacement of Bowers and Toby who were both dropped for performance related reasons. Skipper for the day Rimmer lost the toss and despite giving the opposition skipper the angel eyes, it would be Wargrave to bat first. It’s not ideal when your own skipper wants the game to be done quickly either way. After apologising to his new wife for probably being late for their plans that evening JR promised her that “I will make it tonight” and later told the lads “she’s all on my mind” and the reason he cries every time he thinks of her is because what they have is “more than love,” that he “can’t even imagine a time after the love goes” and if he ever leaves her she’ll be a very lonely girl. Pat myself on the back for that incredible shoe horn job. We’ve powered into the double figures for references already. High fives all-round.

Luckily, when it came to the start of play the weather decided to put the light on. Sharon fell early which left the combo of Boom Boom Thomas™ and Andrew H to rebuild, but after some lovely shots being played and the Wargrave side broke away, the loss of some quick wickets left the Wargrave side in a precarious position. Luckily some of the unusual suspects stepped up to help drive the side towards a good total on what was becoming a difficult surface with the intermittent rain forcing the teams off and on. Luckily the weather brought what was almost a brand-new sunrise to allow ken and Rimmer to finish the innings strongly and help Wargrave to a good looking total of 187.

Before Wargrave took the field to have a bowl, the skipper got the team in for some words of wisdom. Rimmer checked in with his opening bowler Freddie who reassured him that “I will give you everything”. Whilst admittedly strange, it was nice to see such a close relationship with the skipper and his players in the 3s. It was a change to have someone in charge who actually makes a difference for once. A feeling shared by too many people. Despite hopes and prayers, the sky refused to be blue for you, so it was goodnight girl and the game was abandoned with Aldershot looking wobbly at 34-2 caused by Freddie and Sam P taking a wicket each. I was particularly happy with my wicket, after whispering “I want you” and “somehow somewhere I will get you”, to the opposition’s skipper when I was bowling. I was wishing I was lucky and I managed to give a good celebration whilst almost feeling weightless. It was a cracking delivery that had just enough sweet little mystery to leave the batsman with no choice but to give in to temptation and sweet surrender to it. With a little help from my friends, the catch was taken by Ken brilliantly at gully. BOOM 15 SONG REFERENCES IN ONE PARAGRAPH. GET IN.

Congratulations you have wasted a portion of your day reading a match report that didn’t really report on much at all. However, I can confidently say you have read the only sport report ever written that holds a world record 29 separate Wet Wet Wet song references. I have written them in bold for those out there who haven’t spent their Sunday afternoon with google up for research purposes. Also, if you don’t get the references this is a few paragraphs of absolute nonsense.

Notable Performances:
Huw: 35 Rimmer: 34
Freddie: 1-13 Sam P: 1-16

Man of The Match: Me. For this match report.

Match details

Match date

Sat 15 Jun 2019

Kickoff

13:00

Competition

Division 7A

League position

4
Wargrave CC - 3rd XI
9
Aldershot CC - 3rd XI TVCL
Team overview
Further reading